and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
