My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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