it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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