so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
