I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
