You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
