physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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