I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
