Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
