we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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