I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
