I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Randomize
