Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Randomize
