btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
did i just pee glitter
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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