Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
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