i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
