its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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