Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
