You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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