Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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