is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
