New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
