I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Randomize
