..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
