I think my vagina is haunted
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
God, I missed his penis.
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