Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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