just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
