I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
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