K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
