He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
