Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
