I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
They have beer where we have blood.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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