i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize