Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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