my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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