I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
