I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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