Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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