I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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