so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
