if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
