nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
