Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
