you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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