are you so shy because you have an std?
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Randomize