I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
