I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
