They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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