Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
