What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
